Depression tells me many lies throughout the day. It calls me names and brings me down on the daily basis.
But the biggest thing depression loves to tell me is I’m always wrong. It’s like I can’t win or hear over the whispers.
I wake up every day wondering what depression is going to tell me I’m wrong about today. Or better yet, I hope maybe today it will stay away.
Depression creeps up on me when everything is going well. Then, out of nowhere a dark cloud flies over my head and drains me down into a rabbit hole like I’m Alice in Wonderland.
I look up from the hole, questioning every little thing I just did. Listening to what depression “thinks” I did wrong.
I then look down into the world depression made with all my wrongs. I feel dizzy.
My mind wanders through each of the thoughts wondering what actually went wrong. Or is it depression treating me?
Most of the time, it’s depression trying to keep me wrapped up in the world of wrongs. It stops me from my day like the Red Queen worrying about her painted red roses.
I try not to stay down the wrong hole for long. Some days, I can’t help myself from staying longer than I planned on.
I feel as if I’m Alice wandering around, trying to figure out where to turn next and the truth. My Alice self walks around confused and lost until things feel real and I escape.
Words, sentences, and blurs cloud my mind as I’m trapped. Unlike Alice, I have no animals or creatures speaking words of wisdom during my journey.
I have to escape on my own. I have to overcome depression’s lies.
My real life depends on me to be the best I can be without fogging up my vision.
Do you like what you’re reading? Check out my page, Kimi Ann-Marie for various of posts about relationships,anxiety/depression, mom life, and grieving. Check out my page, Positive Thinking About Parents Death for grieving advice about your mom or dad and reminding yourself you’re not alone.